This time I waited until I was sure she was dead before I started celebrating eh?For I'll never forget the last time Margaret Thatcher's death was announced. And I was halfway through a bottle of cheap wine, until I realized it was only John Baird's pussy who had passed.But now ding dong she's really
Continue readingTag: Con Klowns
Montreal Simon: Why We Should Fear What’s Happening in Montreal
It's a scene that keeps repeating itself in the streets of Montreal.A few hundred demonstrators set out on a peaceful march to protest against a totalitarian by-law limiting freedom of assembly.Only to be kettled by the riot squad, and then arrested. Like they were again this weekend.Read more »
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Stephen Harper and the Con Pit Bulls
When you stare at the public face of Stephen Harper's sinister Con regime, what you see is horrifying enough.A tired, morally corrupt regime, that is willing to lie, muzzle people, or do anything to cling to power.But what most Canadians don't see, what is hidden from their view, is even more frightening.Read
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Stephen Harper’s Witch Hunt Backfires Badly
Well it has been a year since Stephen Harper declared war on environmentalists.And started going after the Green Menace like Joe McCarthy went after the red one. Calling respected environmental groups "radicals" and "extremists" and ordering that they be investigated. Now the first results are in, and no doubt Harper is rolling
Continue readingMontreal Simon: The Harper Cons Shame Canada Again
OMG. That wretched little Monkey King has done it again.Pooped on the planet. And shamed us in the eyes of the world.The Harper government is pulling out of a United Nations convention that fights droughts in Africa and elsewhere, which would make Canada the only country in the world outside
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Stephen Harper, Rob Ford, and the Con Liars
The great Abraham Lincoln once said no man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar. But then he didn't live in Con Canada eh? And he didn't know Stephen Harper. Because either the great man was wrong, or Harper has a phenomenal memory. Just like his scary
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Stephen Harper and the Rebranding of Canada
As you know the Con regime is obsessed with changing or rebranding the name and the look of everything Canadian eh?Making the colours of Canada blue and red, like the Con logo, instead of red and white like our flag.Or solemnly declaring honking that henceforth the Government of Canada should be known
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Jimbo Flaherty’s Incredible Shrinking Budget
Well, let's start with the good news eh? Jimbo Flaherty got a fabulous new hat to go with his new shoes when he presented his latest budget today.Or as the Cons call it, his Porky Action Plan 2013.And the bad news?The hat was bigger than the budget. Read more »
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Joe Oliver’s Most Embarrassing Photo-Op
As you know Joe Oliver has had some pretty bad news conferences eh?Like the time he called environmentalists radicals or dangerous extremists.Or the time he claimed we would be able to drink the tarry bubbly from the tailing ponds.Well, the other day he held another big photo-op in Vancouver, and
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Jimbo Flaherty and the Porky Action Monster
Well as you know today was St Patrick's Day, and no doubt wee little Jimbo Flaherty was running around looking for the pot of gold.The one he lost when he cut the GST.And probably wishing he didn't have to call his new budget Porky Action Plan 2013.Because it's hard to
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Stephen Harper, the Scientists, and the Spaceman
It could have been a truly great occasion.A group of Canadian kids getting a chance to talk to a real Canadian hero, Chris Hadfield.But of course he HAD to be there.Hundreds of school children have chatted live with Canadian astronaut Chris Hadfield as he orbits the earth, and now Prime Minister
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Stephen Harper and Our New and Armed Forces
Ever since he came to power Stephen Harper has tried to use the military for crass political purposes.First he tried to use it to change his image from a nerdy policy wonk, to a Great Warrior Leader.And when that failed miserably, for obvious reasons, he set out to change the
Continue readingMontreal Simon: The Slow Erosion of the Harper Regime
I told you he was looking a little worried, or a little desperate.I told you he's been acting funny, or even crazier than usual.And now we know why.It seems that Canadians are finally getting tired of Stephen Harper.And his support is slowly crumbling.Read more »
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Captain Harper and the Partisan Threat
OMG. I don't know how to say this. Because I don't want to cause mass panic eh?But Stephen "Queeg" Harper is looking and sounding crazier than I've EVER seen him.At least since the time he lost his marbles strawberries, and turned the PMO upside down looking for them.For there he
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Stephen Harper’s Great Arctic Betrayal
From the moment he came to power, he announced that he would like to be known as Great Arctic Leader and Lord Protector of the North.He decreed that henceforth everything from government stationery, to the nose of his plane, should be embossed with the words "The True North Strong and
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Stephen Harper and the Carbon Trap
It's been the weirdest winter ever where I live.It was so warm for so long it took forever for the canal to freeze, until it was safe enough to skate on.Then it thawed so quickly, the net got stranded in the middle of nowhere, with the ice too thin to
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Jimbo Flaherty and the Day of Reckoning
If you wanted to know where our economy is heading, or what the Cons are planning to do to Canada.All you had to do was look at Jimbo Flaherty today, to know it's not going to be pretty.And that the Day of Reckoning has finally arrived.For there he was standing
Continue readingMontreal Simon: Strangelove Flanagan and the Con Regime
As you may know, I have for many years portrayed Tom Flanagan as Dr Strangelove.I've always considered him a bizarre right-wing crank, and Alberta firewall separatist.I never understood why the CBC hired him, and then didn't fire him after he said Julian Assange should be murdered.So I'm not really surprised
Continue readingMontreal Simon: The Apocalyptic Destruction of The Harper Cons
Damn. As much as I hate doing it, I'm going to have to give Boss Harper some credit eh?The final collapse of his Con regime is turning out to be a heavenly show. And far more wonderfully apocalyptic than even I had hoped.For if on Wednesday it was Wallin, flying
Continue readingMontreal Simon: The Snowmageddon and the Con Apocalypse
Golly. I don't know how I did it. Survived the Great Toronto Snowmageddon.Because it was brutal eh?Toronto has not seen a snowfall exceeding 15 centimetres since Dec. 19, 2008, said Environment Canada senior climatologist David Phillips.Not the storm itself, which was only a Snowmageddon if you don't live in Alberta,
Continue reading