Confirmed by science, or, Just as I always suspected…

I’ve often said here and elsewhere that, in my observation, conservatives tend to be very lazy-minded and/or drink-addled. Now, it appears that science bears me out:

And now there’s the new study linking conservative ideologies to “low-effort” thinking.

“People endorse conservative ideology more when they have to give a first or fast response,” the study’s lead author, University of Arkansas psychologist Dr. Scott Eidelman, said in a written statement released by the university.

Does the finding suggest that conservatives are lazy thinkers?

“Not quite,” Dr. Eidelman told The Huffington Post in an email. “Our research shows that low-effort thought promotes conservatism, not that political conservatives use low-effort thinking.”

So John Stuart Mill was onto something when he said “Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives”? Who’d of thunk…

As to the “drink-addled” bit, here ’tis:

Bar patrons were asked about social issues before blowing into a Breathalyzer. As it turned out, the political viewpoints of patrons with high blood alcohol levels were more likely to be conservative than were those of patrons whose blood alcohol levels were low.

But it wasn’t just the alcohol talking, according to the statement. When the researchers conducted similar interviews in the lab, they found that people who were asked to evaluate political ideas quickly or while distracted were more likely to express conservative viewpoints.

“Keeping people from thinking too much…or just asking them to deliberate or consider information in a cursory manner can impact people’s political attitudes, and in a way that consistently promotes political conservatism,” Dr. Eidelman said in the email.

I’m not surprised by this drink link, either. Sloppy snap decision-making seems to be a common denominator in both cases. I once met a rabidly conservative man (who fancied himself a writer, alas); he was also the only person I’ve ever met who was actually PROUD to be an alcoholic, and who did not even see his condition as an illness. (Yes, that IS fucked up. I’m just glad I no longer have anything to do with him.)

Friends don’t let friends drink and drive; maybe we should also put out bumper stickers saying Friends don’t let friends drink…and vote Conservative. A laudable public service message, don’t you think?