(Ottawa, September 17) DawgNews has learned that an unprecedented collection of horsefeathers has been found at the University of Calgary, encased in several fossilized copies of Alberta Report.
Representing early stages of the evolution of political discourse, the discovery has already got students and practitioners of paleopolitics talking.
“It’s all here,” said Morris Leeson, whose excavations of the so-called Drumheller Dialogues have commanded international attention. “Pro-life, no gays, tar sands, union-busting, climate fraud, even one or two cartoons of Mohammed. I’m excited. It’s a veritable treasure trove.”
The ancient find appears to represent a line that had been thought extinct until a flourishing colony of flying horses was indirectly detected in Ottawa in 2006. “We haven’t actually found our ‘Pegasus’ yet,” said Litt Fredwin, a local pundit. “But Parliament Hill has been knee-deep in fresh horsefeathers for nearly six years. It’s just a matter of time.”
The Calgary discovery is expected to be compared to proto-Reformer plumage recently recovered from pellets of amber at the University of Alberta. Insufficient DNA has been found to enable a re-creation in the latter case, but Ted Morton, of the department of political paleontology at the University of Calgary, said, “It’s hardly necessary: after all, we really never died out.”