Our family was at the cottage recently when we got news of an old friend who had died young of a heart attack. That got us talking about memories of infirmity and serious illness. I began to recall my Dad – he was only 52 when he suffered his first
Continue readingAuthor: Donna Thomson
THE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: I am Fine if Nick is Fine
My last blog post was about saying ‘I’m fine’ when I am not fine. That got me thinking about the state of being ‘not fine’. For me and for most other caregivers I know personally, that state is most acutely felt when our charge is ill, injured or somehow away
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Saying "I’m Fine" When I’m Not
Yesterday I was chatting with an online friend – a mother who is lightyears ahead of me in wisdom and experience. We were talking about coping with the stress of raising a child who is very medically complex. My friend wrote “I’ve always felt like two people. The woman I
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Keeping the Demons at Bay
Yesterday, I wrote about those disaster scenarios that have a way of poisoning our imaginations. Today, I’ve been thinking about some strategies that I use to keep the demons at bay, especially now, when an trip to the emergency room with Nicholas is fresh in my mind. Nick is 23
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: The Caregivers’ Worst Fear
Every caregiver has a worst fear – a nightmare scenario that unfolds like an unwanted, sinister guest in the imagination. It might be triggered by the sound of an unusual thud upstairs, a front door slamming, or the smell of burning toast. In my case, it’s the telephone. When Nicholas
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Why Do I Care, Why Do You Care?
I just love when I receive messages from strangers who share my interest in exploring ideas about caregiving. Last evening, the little red number ‘1’ appeared above the message symbol on my Facebook page (also called The Caregivers’ Living Room). A student wanted to know if I would share her
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: A Very Welcome Virtual Dinner Guest
Last night the extended family, minus Nicholas and my Mum, were around the dinner table at the lake. Just fyi, on the menu was grilled salmon, black bean and corn salad with lime and cilantro, chipotle mayo coleslaw and berry pie with ice cream. My daughter Natalie was here with
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Cranky Old Man – A Poetic Life Lesson
I saw this today while browsing the internet – it’s for us. We, who love and care for our ageing parents or our children, sisters or brothers with disabilities – this poem speaks about what we already know, because we give care. Cranky Old Man…..What do you see nurses? .
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: The Caregivers’ Best Friend – TYZE
My son Nicholas’ care is complex. He has round the clock one-to-one caregivers including awake night nurses by the bedside. Nick has a nasty habit of stopping breathing and the nurses rub his cheek or ear to get him going again. They reposition him frequently for pain and help him
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: 7 Habits of Highly Effective People – Caregivers too!
This morning I was doodling around looking at online news when I noticed this article on the business page. “Hmmm”, I thought, ‘7 Habits of Highly Effective People’ could be something that applied as well to caregivers and people with disabilities. I have never heard of Stephen Covey, the author
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Love and Memory at the Lake
My husband Jim and I met and married ‘up at the lake’ as we call our summer place in the Quebec Laurentians. Jim’s parents met and married at the lake too. Our grandparents were part of a group of friends, all english Montrealers, who bought property at the lake in
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Malicious Whispers and Dangerous Trends
Occasionally, I will read something that another person has said or written and I think, “I just wrote about the same ideas last week! Are some of us wired to the same computer?!” The new summer edition of Abilities Magazine features an article I wrote about a trend that I
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Should My Daughter Be Her Brother’s Keeper?
When my daughter Natalie was about three, her favourite game was ‘hospital’. This involved her lying in bed with toilet paper wrapped around her leg, making a cast. The whole imobilized limb was then strung up with a skipping rope over a hook on ceiling creating a makeshift ‘traction’ device.
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Nick’s Home Had a Birthday!
When Nicholas was born in August of 1988, we thought he was perfectly healthy and normal – except perhaps for the fact that he was premature and weighed under four pounds. It was five months later, after several trips to the emergency room for dehydration due to Nick’s inability to
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Young Carers’ Rap
Tricky P, rapping on being a young carer for his grandparents. A terrific young artist giving voice to the experience of roughly 108,000 in Canada alone who are under 18 and provide care to a family member on a regular basis. The Young Carers’ Initiative is an organization here in
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Sex and The Special Needs Parent
There’s something about caring for a child with disabilities that takes the “red” out of “hot” in the marital bed. The arrival of a baby, healthy or not, can often put a damper on sex in the city. I remember comparing notes with other young Mums when my kids were
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Help for Caregivers
TYZE is a software programme that helps to coordinate a group of people who care about someone receiving care. If you care a caregiver, have a look at this video! We have a Tyze network for Nick and one for my Mum who is 90 and lives on her own.
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: New Blog Look and Book Review
Hi There! I’m working on making my blog better and easier to read. I hope that anyone who likes a particular post will share it! Also, I got an exciting email today from Terri Mauro, another Mum and author of the special needs parents portal on About.com – I had
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Some Doctors are Better Than Others!
Some doctors are better than others – ask anyone with an ageing parent or a complex child. Do you know any doctor who still makes house calls? I DO and he’s our doctor! Dr. Robert Eaton is my personal hero. He is a family doctor who is famous throughout our
Continue readingTHE CAREGIVERS' LIVING ROOM - A Blog by Donna Thomson: Why Our Special Needs Family Loves Technology
Recently, I was asked to contribute a piece on the subject of technology and parenting a son with disabilities for the blog http://vancouvermom.ca. Here is what I wrote: Article by Donna Thomson, disability activist, author and consultant, and user of the Tyze social network. Technology Became an Essential Tool In January of
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