They lived on the margins of society as a travelling entertainment act. A classic clown-and-baboon show, in the old Czech style. They had terrorized a generation of Eastern European children. Pozo the Clown (once known to his family and a … Continue reading →
Continue readingTag: Toulouse Le Grandfig
mark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Another Day in Paradise
“Dude!” “Coko!” “Dude!” “Coko!” “Dude!” [sound of engine being gunned, squeal of tires … then the screams] Alltop also has opposable thumbs. Photo via Twisted Vintage.< Originally published May, 2010./h6>
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: The Master
I still think back to those days in Japan, when I studied zazen under the guidance of Rōshi Miaki. I had been looking for something in my life, and when I stumbled upon the group of monks, quietly sitting, I … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: The Best Part of Waking Up Is … VOLTREX HAS YOUR TOAST
All the cybernetic units in the Voltrag Collective understood that breakfast was the most important meal of the day for humans, especially for their developing offspring. Without breakfast, human spawn could run into all kind of behavioral and biological issues, … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Performance art gone horribly right
All of the critics agreed. Hans Feckenbruke’s performance piece, “Transcending Irony: post-post-modern capitalism in the Western World, from the top of the Chrysler Building, as seen from the perspective of consumers on the ground,” was a spectacular — if messy … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: The loneliness of the long distance rabbit
The stats were daunting. The average breeding season for rabbits is 9 months (10 in Newfoundland). Gestation time is 30 days. Each litter produces somewhere between 4 to 12 kits (baby rabbits). It takes 4 to 5 weeks to wean … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Appropriate Dress Required
Sometimes you feel like putting on a pretty little sundress, and prancing around in a meadow with the butterflies. Other days, you wake up and think: rubber dress … fishnet stockings … gasmask and shotgun … fuck yeah! But pack … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Bingo and Floggie
Of all the singing clown acts to grace the stages of Europe and Asia in the first half of the 20th century, none have had the impact that Bingo and Floggie did on the collective unconscious. It’s a well-known fact … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: It’s morning in the Singularity
Bob was not a happy cyborg. He’d had to skip is plasma bath and neural detox that morning because his dick of a boss, a narcissistic self-sustaining photosynthetic artificial intelligence named TODD-bot, needed him to come to work early. And … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Joel and the Corporate Ziggurat
Joel LeFrappe was an up-and-coming executive in the Massive and Deranged Cricket and Palmistry (MaDCaP) Continuum, homeworld of ToryWorks 4000, a rival firm of NaziWorks 3000 (The Caring Company). While ToryWorks was not as cruel and deliciously monolithic as NaziWorks, … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: A Portrait of Chauncey Migswith-Piggerton
Occupation: Professor, Arse-Elbow Differentiation, UBS Marital Status: Married to the unfortunate Alison Migswith-Piggerton. Offspring: Daughter, Jenny, 24. And the loathsome Peter, son, 27. Hobbies: Angling, rat keeping, and touching “things.” Nationality: English, though he claims to have a little Irish … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: When in Rome
You know what Harvey hated? He really hated it when people misquoted things or used sayings the wrong way. For example: the proof is in the pudding. “No fucker.” Harvey would say, “the proof isn’t in the god-damned pudding, the … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Furnished room for let
The Kelly Gang was notorious, not only for their 1905 pancake rampage through East Ham, but for their queer genetic makeup. In the back row, you can make out the vacant gazes of Bertie (left), Wayne (middle) and Herbert (right). … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: How it all began, I mean, AFTER the nuclear explosion
[phone rings] Sumiko: Soto Noodle — you will want to suck them fast! Godzilla: So you serve noodles? Sumiko: Yes sir, we are noodle shop. Godzilla: Excellent, I’d like an order of noodles, shaken not stirred. [pause] Sumiko: I’m sorry…
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Solutions for an empty galaxy
Long before Enrico Fermix had questioned why there was no sign of advanced species visiting Earth, despite the vastness of the universe and the likelihood of intelligent star-faring species evolving on other planets, Douglas Prong wondered the same thi…
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: A moment of gritty reflection
Delores always liked to take a few moments between shows and get a little alone time. Of late the circus had been touring in the Southwest and they’d seen lots of desert. Delores liked the desert. It reminded her of … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Brittany
In her high school class yearbook, Brittany had been deemed “the most likely to be found dead in a dumpster”, but she had confounded her critics. First she had joined the circus, where her extensive tattoos and devastating overbite had … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Dominus Vobiscum
After the disastrous Papacy of Benedict XVI, all the secret societies decided to go a different way with the new pontiff. The Freemasons were keen to start putting their new genetic engineering technology to use, and so create some kind … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Video dating
“So is it on?” Voice from off-camera: “Let me check.” [camera shakes slightly] “Yep, you’re good.” “Okay, so you might not guess this from looking at me, but I’m actually a real sensitive dude. I enjoy art, black and white … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: The book of transformation
He had no idea how long he’d been there. It seemed like an age. All around him was the sound of the other body parts. Two pages over the heart wouldn’t shut up. Thump-whoosh, thump-whoosh, it pumped its non-existent blood, … Continue reading →
Continue reading