mark a rayner: Coda: The Skwib Goes Eerily Quiet

Usually, this is the last thing you see. Then something bad happens. The Skwib will return on June 29th. I just need to recharge my insanity suit. Until then, feel free to browse the archives, check out one of my books, or check out Alltop for other mental drivel.

mark a rayner: Reservoir Clowns

I’m sure Quentin Tarantino isn’t thinking of a remake, but if he did this, it would be TERRIFYING. Alltop is the Harlequin of humor aggregators. Photo by drewlevy

mark a rayner: Fridges with the Internet

An excellent question. Not sure if you need to write a whole book about it, but it makes a nice backdrop.    Alltop cannot lie. It loves big backdrops.

mark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: A day with clowns

A day with clowns, a photo by flavita.valsani on Flickr.

mark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Ask General Kang: If I say I’m going to be there, but then I don’t show up, does that make me a ‘douche-bag’?

Yes. Yes, it does. If you say you are going to be there, but then never turn up, then you are a wanker, pure and simple. Unless you have a good excuse, of course. It’s best to make them as … Continue reading →

mark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Happy New Year’s!

Happy New Years all! And thanks to The Cartoon Blog for the cartoon. Alltop is always new and funny.

mark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Dr. Tundra enters a bar …

Dr. Tundra enters a bar and orders a drink. The bar has a robot bartender, with great drink-making and conversational algorithms, but no facial or voice-recognition software. The robot serves him a perfectly prepared Peyote Sling, and then asks him: … Continue reading →

mark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Clown Apocalypse: Beach Happies

Of course, many people had been going about their day-to-day business when they were afflicted by the Bozo Virus. Some were at work, some at home, but some had been on holiday when the plague struck. They showed all the … Continue reading →

The Skwib: Troy and Abed — Christmas Infiltration

Alltop enjoys “infiltrating” your funny bone.

The Skwib: Clowns ARE scary!

Clowns ARE scary!, a photo by Phil Kneen( on Flickr.

The Skwib: Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em

Untitled, a photo by Foxtongue on Flickr. This cocky little duo signifies that The Skwib will be re-running good stuff from the archives for the next few weeks, while I attempt, once again, to write 50,000 words during the month of November. I have been successful once, but the fact that I’m already about 8,000 ...

The Skwib: Jerry Seinfeld on Halloween

Alltop is made of the cheapest, grey aggregator on the web.

The Skwib: Writing makes you mad

… isolator isolates!, a photo by x-ray delta one on Flickr.

The Skwib: porch

porch, a photo by philipjbond on Flickr. Boba Fett’s journal: “Last night I had that terrible dream where I got slowly digested over a 1000 years again. I wonder what it means? But in real world — totally looking forward to the Hutt Annual BBQ this weekend. Life has been so good since I captured ...

The Skwib: the critic

the critic, a photo by Mattijn on Flickr.

The Skwib: Fight Your Demons

Fight Your Demons, a photo by Lissy Elle on Flickr.

The Skwib: Welcome To Earth II

Welcome To Earth II, a photo by sartiax on Flickr.

The Skwib: Insecurities Worksheet

Insecurities Worksheet, a photo by lunchbreath on Flickr.

The Skwib: Cradle of Humankind – Flora

Cradle of Humankind – Flora, a photo by Martin_Heigan on Flickr.

The Skwib: Pirate Monkey

Tiny Pirate, Monkey of The Seven Seas, a photo by Ape Lad on Flickr. Combining two of my favourite things in one cartoon!

The Skwib: The love that dare not speak its name

“Oh Sergei, do you think we’ll ever escape this festering plain, this landscape of ennui and emptiness, so that we can share our love as it was meant to be shared?” “Mmphmh…mghmm…” “What Sergei? I can’t hear you through my containment suit?” “Mgnnnnn! Mgnnnn!” “Oh, I love you too Sergei. Fishheads. We’ll have fishheads! And ...

The Skwib: Hamster Naming Guide, 2008 Protocols

HamsterNamingGuide2009, a photo by lunchbreath on Flickr. I don’t have 2009 or 2010 protocols available to share, but for those of you naming hamsters in 2011: Obvious: Hammy Portly: Kirstie Good: Buddha (also could be used for Portly, if male) Evil: Gehenna Skinny: Imogen Obscure: Thangador I would love to know some of the other ...

The Skwib: The Marvellous Kindle Giveaway

I’m giving away one Kindle when my mailing list reaches 500! How to Enter: Just join my newsletter, The MonkeySphere, and you’ll be entered in the draw. (Click on the link or fill out the form to the right.) How to Enter Twice & Three Times: Buy Marvellous Hairy (paperback) (Kindle edition) and/or The Amadeus ...

The Skwib: Efficacy

Efficacy, a photo by lunchbreath on Flickr.

The Skwib: The Minkey that Stole the Pink Panther: Chief Inspector Dreyfus

I loved the Peter Sellers Pink Panther movies, but I always thought that Herbert Lom was on the edge of stealing these movies from their purported star — and in fact does in the Revenge of the Pink Panther (1976). I remember going to see it in the theatre with my family, and my mother ...