Oh, you silly humans and your fascination with robots! And I don’t mean the kind of useful robots that actually exist, like the ones in factories. I assume that by “robot”, you’re interested in the sentient “danger Will Robinson, danger!” … Continue reading →
Continue readingAuthor: Mark
mark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Why an economist makes a bad leader
At least one of the reasons. Stephen Harper has an MA in economics, and he has other issues. You know what gives you a better background than economics? Camp counsellor. Alltop went to Camp Ha Ha.
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: The loneliness of the long distance rabbit
The stats were daunting. The average breeding season for rabbits is 9 months (10 in Newfoundland). Gestation time is 30 days. Each litter produces somewhere between 4 to 12 kits (baby rabbits). It takes 4 to 5 weeks to wean … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: DOES John Woo hate helicopters?
A longitudinal study of John Woo helicopter hate: Film Helicopters Destroyed Helicopters Used Unsafely Hard Target (1993) 0 1 Broken Arrow (1996) 4* too many to count Face/Off (1997) 0 3 Mission Impossible 2 (2000) 0 2 Paycheck (2003) 0 … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: From the annals of really useless superpowers
#UselessSuperPowers was a thing on Twitter yesterday, and it was nice to see one in cartoon form. Please use the comment form to add your own, Alltop can make you laugh at the speed of sound.
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Ask General Kang: How did you deal with climate change on your planet?
An interesting question. Because my planet is so far advanced of yours, we experienced our major climate changes about a millennia ago. Like you are currently experiencing, on Neecknaw we discovered that our oil and coal-based economy increased the carbon … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Ancient Egyptian Pepperpot Ladies
[Mrs. Beset is washing her cat in the Nile, when Mrs. Knouphis enters, carrying a papyrus-reed basket, filled with jars of human organs.] Mrs. Knouphis: “‘Allo Mrs. Beset.” Mrs. Beset: “‘Allo Mrs. Knouphis.” K: “‘Av you ‘eard about that Mrs. … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Rappin’ with Atwood and Moore
My Twitter feed has been fun the last few days, including an exchange with one of my favorite authors, and a literary legend. I was also surprised to discover that Margaret Atwood hasn’t seen the movie 300: And Christopher Moore … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Bingo and Floggie
Of all the singing clown acts to grace the stages of Europe and Asia in the first half of the 20th century, none have had the impact that Bingo and Floggie did on the collective unconscious. It’s a well-known fact … Continue reading →
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: How to outrage four kinds of nerds with one image
I think we may have discovered a new sport. (via Humor Train.) Alltop cannot be offended by humor, unless you make fun of Power Rangers. Then it’s gloves off!
Continue readingSlap Upside The Head: Slap Upside The Hiatus
The astute among you may have perceived somewhat of a reduction in the frequency of updates over the past several weeks. With Slap approaching its seventh year, I need a break to focus on other things for a bit. In the meantime, by popular demand, a prancing unicorn has returned to the
Continue readingmark a rayner | scribblings, squibs & sundry monkey joys: Man Watches The Hunt for Red October 168 Times, Decides It’s Not that Good
LONDON, ONTARIO (The Skwib) — After a courageous 12 weeks, Terry Bakker has abandoned his New Year’s Resolution to watch The Hunt for Red October every time it comes on TV. “I had no idea how often TBS, Spike and … Continue reading →
Continue readingSlap Upside The Head: Documentary about Homophobia in Jamaica
Check out this trailer for An Abominable Crime, a documentary about the rampant (and often ignored) homophobia problem in Jamaica. The filmmakers are currently fundraising to help get this film finished, and The Pulitzer Center has offered to match all Kickstarter donations. So go check it out and offer some support
Continue readingSlap Upside The Head: Men Aquitted For Ordering Gay Drink
Two Cameroon men who were sentenced to five years in prison for “looking gay” after ordering Bailey’s Irish Cream have been acquitted of the charges by an appeals court. The two had already passed a year of their sentence before the acquittal. Homosexuality is illegal in Cameroon, and is subject to harsh penalties.
Continue readingSlap Upside The Head: Russia Goes After American Pop Divas
Less than a year ago, the Russian city of St. Petersburg passed a law banning “homosexual propaganda,” with expected hysterical results. From equal rights marches to rainbows on milk cartons, no one seems to be safe from the accusing eyes of the ruling United Russia party in their search for
Continue readingSlap Upside The Head: Skip Out On The Anti-Gay Salvation Army
It’s about that time of year when the folks at The Salvation Army start ringing bells in front of their red kettles, soliciting donations. If you happen to see a Salvation Army kettle this holiday season, here’s a few reasons you should probably give your money to a more worthwhile
Continue readingSlap Upside The Head: Nova Scotia Passes Trans Rights Bill
Slap reader Paul has written in with some good news coming out of Nova Scotia. The province passed its Transgendered Persons Protection Act on Friday, explicitly protecting trans Nova Scotians from housing and employment discrimination. The bill still requires royal assent before becoming law, but there’s nothing to worry about
Continue readingSlap Upside The Head: School Trustee Says Gay Students Should Act Less Gay
If you’re a student in Alberta hoping that the school boards will offer some official protection from anti-gay bullying, it looks like you’re going to have to keep hoping. Last week, the Alberta School Boards Association rejected a proposal to adopt a province-wide anti-bullying policy aimed at protecting GLBT students and staff. So, now that […]
Continue readingSlap Upside The Head: Vatican Reacts To Equal Marriage Advances
Last Tuesday saw some pretty big wins for equal marriage rights in the United States. Voters in Maryland, Washington, and Maine solidly supported same-sex marriage, marking the first time that a popular vote granted marriage rights to same-sex couples in the country. As usual, whenever big steps toward equality is made, I just have to […]
Continue readingSlap Upside The Head: Family Coalition Party Focuses On Bathrooms
Let’s do some quick word association. When I say “gender identity,” say the first thing tha—OMG TOILETS!!!! I’m not exactly sure where Ontario’s fringe Family Coalition Party gets its funding, considering they routinely get less than a quarter of a percent of the popular vote, but they seem to have
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