Grief is an oscillation between want and have, between need and want, between here and gone. It does strange things to a person. When my mother died I kept saying to my aunt, over and over, “this must be so hard for you”. A Freudian might call it transference. My
Continue readingAuthor: cenobyte
centre of the universe: Dreamlet
A friend had invited me to the ‘viewing’ of their first grandchild in a community centre, or maybe in the common room of a condo complex. The new baby was teensy, with a shock of bright red hair. We’re talking Beaker hair, here, and it was perfect. When I got
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Olfactory Sense
I was cleaning the bed linens this morning, which always accompanied a spraying down of the mattress with hydrogen peroxide & essential oils (no, not lavender; I don’t especially like lavender). Into the “warsh”, as my great-step-grandmother would say, with the sheets and mattress cover. I love doing the bed
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Chimney Ducks and David’s Irises
I was feeling pretty cruddy today; a kind of nonspecific languishing that makes no sense to me given it’s a perfect day in the perfect month of the perfect week. Everyone is relatively healthy, Child the Eldar is getting ready to strike out on his own, and generally I am
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Pride
June is Pride month, a time when we recognise some of the glorious human diversity in the world. We celebrate being able to be openly who we are, and specifically, Pride is about remembering the riots in Stonewall in 1969, when LGBTQ+ folks fought police brutality against our community. There
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Labour
There comes a point when a woman is labouring in childbirth when she says “I can’t do this”. Usually that’s a hallmark of what’s called transitional labour, and it usually means she absolutely can do it, and is likely about to do it with aplomb. Well-seasoned labour and delivery midwives
Continue readingcentre of the universe: 40 years
Some anniversaries we don’t need to remember. My Da just called to remind me that it was 40 years ago today that his father, my Gramps, was killed in a farm accident. Do you have a singular day that changed the trajectory of your life? I remember that
Continue readingcentre of the universe: I wish I were joking
But I’m not. If I wrote this as fiction my editors would cross it out as too far fetched. https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/saskatchewan/comedy-holiday-horrors-jillian-bell-1.4960005
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Please no
They let me write another thing: https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/saskatchewan/worst-christmas-gifts-1.4917150
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Standing – NaBloPoMo Day 16
It’s Giftmas Sales Season (GSS) and I get to person the booth at the first big giftmas market of the year. You may think this is the Worst Thing Evar, but it’s not. Everyone is happy. Excited. Fulla beans. There’s enough time for Humbuggery; today though I’m looking forward to
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Music Fatigue – NaBloPoMo Day 14
There’s an interesting conundrum in the fall, that gets people arguing every year. More than just Daylight Saving Time (which is silly and all this malarky with changing clocks makes no sense). More than just who’s going to sit where at Thanksgiving. More than the gamble of when you’re to
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Cat videos – NaBloPoMo Day 13
Let’s take a moment to remember the origins of something that’s changed the way we do business, the way we consume arts and culture, and ultimately, the way we communicate. In the 1960s, the US government (particularly the department of defence) was working to develop a communications network that could
Continue readingcentre of the universe: So that was a thing – NaBloPoMo Day 12
*warning: you may wish to pre-clutch your pearls because this is a seriously hardcore post* we went to the new Costco today. I was supposed to get a hot dog but I didn’t. #HisNibs made a hot dog for supper at home instead. The new Costco is exactly like the
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Could Have Been – NaBloPoMo Day 11
Whoops. So here’s the thing. NEW PHONE WHO DIS – yeah, I got a new phone. I thought everything was working but I was, as our friend Big T would say, “I was mistooken”. Days go by SUPER fast now. I swear to Glob I thought last week was next
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Wrong Universe – NaBloPoMo Day 8
My mum was a brilliant woman. So was my grandmother. So is my aunt. So is my other aunt. It’s pretty cool the amount of brain power all the wymmyns be bringin’ all up in this family. I used to sit on the corner of mum’s bed and watch her
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Empty – NaBloPoMo Day 7
I worked pretty hard this past weekend. I was at a retreat. Had some rewriting to do on a manuscript. Thought it’d be easy. Boy, was I wrong. I mean. I knew I had a lot to rework. I just had no idea that I could actually focus like that.
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Home – NaBloPoMo Day 6
Pretty sure that in most prairie homes there is someone’s gran’s needlework that says “home is where the heart is”. We never had that on the wall at our house because my grandmother was a nurse and she used to say things like “the thoracic cavity is where the heart
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Snow Sky – NaBloPoMo Day 5
I don’t like snow skies. I don’t like grey air and grey skies. Not one bit. I look at the ground a lot when there’s sky-poop happening. I don’t mind when the sky poop lands and it’s all pretty and sparkly and new and fresh and why the shit did
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Concern – NaBloPoMo Day 4
My father was asking recently whether any more of my articles might be featured on the CBC website. I mentioned I hadn’t pitched any lately, mostly for REASONS that involve being a) pretty busy; b) kinda brain-dead; c) most likely undernourished since our oven is busted and my slow cooker
Continue readingcentre of the universe: Blinders – NaBloPoMo
Sometimes I’m positive the dog has the right idea. Probably this is why people started keeping their domesticated animals in their houses with them; they saw reflected in their animal buddies aspects of their own natures that they couldn’t quite talk about for whatever reason. Maybe they couldn’t name it
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